Skip to main content

Heat

There's a burning orb of yellow-whiteness in the sky. It hurts my eyes when I look at it. The world is full of blues and yellows where there should be grays and browns, and when I exercise I get rivulets of fluid running off me. I was recently sponged with a damp cloth and then scraped with a wand. FarmWife called it a sweat scraper.

What is this sweat stuff? What is this golden emanation from the sky? Help me understand. I am just a simple mule from the rainy NorthWest.

FenBar

Comments

  1. As a Texas mare let me assure you Fenway that that big white-yellow thingy is supposed to be there. Unfortunately, here the great space heater in the sky is our ever constant foe on which we must wage constant war. It's so hot here in South Texas that even the grass has gone into hiding and refuses to come out.

    To keep cool even when the sun is at it's worst I'll pass on the Brewster horse's helpful hints...

    1) Electrolytes (potassium-free): You should get them early in the day so that they're in your system when it starts to warn up.

    2) Your water should always be in the shade (at least in the heat of the day, so that it's always cool and soothing to your sensitive mouth parts.

    3) Your big meals should be fed during the coolest parts of the day so that you may digest them without the stress of the unbearable heat.

    4) You should never be soaked in the middle of the day unless your human is prepared to scrape off the excess water. If the water sits under your hair it will heat quickly and soon you'll be even hotter than you were before.

    5) If you're sweating just out in the pasture you should inform Farmwife that you'll need to receive double rations to maintain your strength (Sister in: Not double, but decidly more to make up for the extra calories being lost during the day.) (Missy in: More is always better.)

    6) To keep coats beautiful and glossy each day should end with a shower, once the air cools alittle, to help wash away the grime and sweat of the day. Not only will your hair look better, but in the morning you'll be cooler without a layer of yuck on hour skin.

    7) Farmwife will also want to flood around your watertrough or another well traveled area to insure your beautiful tootsies stay moist and shiny.

    With much love and prayers that your rain has defaulted to Texas,

    Missy the Mare, as taken down by Sister.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks in Advance for Your Mulish Opinion!

Popular Posts

Here are the Cloud Dog's X-Rays

Here, for your edification, are the X-rays of dear Paisley's leg. There is, apparently, no new break (since his Monday siezure) but there is, of course, a great deal of abnormality caused by years of living with a shortened ulna. His pronounced lameness, the vet says, may temporarily improve. Unlike me, Fenway Bartholomule, poor cloud dog can't expect much in the way of a full recovery.   Not having the $$$$ for surgery to fuse the joint, we are working on making some sort of rigid splint to support the limb and prevent further degeneration. That is, the humans (with their space-age material inventions and their opposable thumbs) are working on making a splint; I am working on giving cloud dog brayful looks of support and encouragement every time he totters into the yard to relieve himself. As always, he fears me (me?!) and keeps his distance.  Ears to you,  Fenway

Vegan Spring Rolls

I, Fenway Bartholomule, am a vegan: of course I only eat plants, not people! My human is too, so I'm sharing my blog with her today so that she can participate in the 2014 Virtual Vegan Potluck ! When you're done perusing the recipe for these delicious spring rolls, click "back" or "forward" for the entire potluck experience! Virtual Vegan Potluck: Spring Roll Appetizers Beautiful? Check. Healthy? Check. Delicious? Check. Easy? Check. Fancy? Check. Quick to clean up after? Check. Vegan? OF COURSE! If you're looking for something portable, colorful, and crowd-pleasing for your next potluck, look no further than these simple vegan spring rolls! The best part? You can substitute ANYTHING. I never make these the same way twice, so play around with cilantro, kale, cabbage, scallions, or whatever you think sounds good! Ingredients Veggie mix: 2 carrots (grated) 4 oz mung bean sprouts 1/3 cup chopped peanuts (raw, or roasted and salted) or ...

2025 State of the Farmlet Address

A red stag photographed by Farmwife in Scotland, from whence the family descends and to where they voyaged in September 2024.  Dear Mules and Countrywomen,  It is my pleasure to report to you today, from my forested vantage point, that the Farmlet is well.  It has been eight years since my family had a Farmlet to report upon, and this one is among the best. It is 25 minutes south of Casa de Bartholomule-Teaspoon, where you may remember the family lived for a time, and situated on the same verdant island. It is 120 minutes south of Bent Barrow Farm, where the ancient rhododendron still blooms and where FenBar's old barn of many colors still stands and shelters farm machinery. This place has rhododendrons, too, encircling a lawn which slopes down to my barn and paddock. We call the barn Hoofhouse, and it is going to be painted black in the spring to match the house and my companion, Puck.  My paddock, by design, does not overlap the lawn but instead winds through a mix...

Catastrophy

This is the emergency broadcast system. This is not a test. I was going to entertain you with more haiku today, but something terrible has happened. I need your support. Today was supposed to be a regular spa day—a nice little hoofie trim, a fresh mane roach, an ear massage, and a handful of sunflower seeds (for shine). Instead of merely taking care of my beauty routine, however, FarmWife spent a full hour in contemplation of and attention to my overall physique. The upshot? A revision of my condition from Plump to Obese. (Her actual words, upon removing my blanket for the first time in a few days, were "Oh my God! You've ballooned!") She has decided that my fatness has become a health risk, and has resolved to exercise me as often as possible. It gets dark at 4:30. Her husband gets home at 5:30. She has small children and no sitter. This, my friends, means that I will end up being longed. Longed at the end of a stupid, smelly old rope. Forced to walk and trot...