
A more short-tempered mule would have resorted to violence. A more passive one might have accepted defeat. Not I! Diplomacy is equal parts tact and gumption, and so I solved the problem without bloodshed.
I pinned my ears, glaring with nostril upcurled. She looked startled, but recommenced to eating. I snaked my head at her, lips tight. She edged away, but continued to snack. I took her ear, then. I took it ehhhhhhver so gently in my teeth. With delicate, guiding pressure, I lifted her head out of my meal and onto her own. I walked her like a naughty schoolboy over to her own delicious dinner and I deposited her there with a look of stern reprehension. She stayed put, and if she had had command of the English language she might have said, "yes, sir. I won't do it again, sir."
I am a problem solver. I am a diplomat. I am never cruel.
Ears,
FenBar
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